Friday, April 9, 2010

Embracing the fear and Accepting the Change you brought.

First I was a quiet man and I have nothing, nothing significant at all but myself. I live in a world where I am my world, I am the GOD am the one, the truth and I decide things that happen to me all by myself but also considering the situation and influences around me. I painted it with black and white, I block all unecessary ideals and people, no one comes close and no ones closer. It was a dictatorship, I wasn't letting myself free, I'm caging myself where there's loneliness where there's sadness, where there's numbness and I have known that. Despite the knowledge of it, I embraced it, I linger upon it, I think I liked it when I was there but it was a lie. It was a lie because I'm not happy, It was a lie because I didn't enjoy it at all, It was a lie because I was limiting myself, How can I be myself if I'm limiting it? It looks like I'm stopping me to be me. It's sad that I have to come through that before I finally let someone in. To rephrase she's not just someone, she's the light, just like a candle in a dark room or a simple spark that a match make, I can't help but to compare her into a light. Just like a light, brings hope, brings energy, brings something or color to everything, enlightens and empowers.

It was dark, I was fading, I was digging a very deep hole and bury myself in there as time arrives. I find it dull and full of crap, till time decides and you came. It was an opportunity, it was a chance of a lifetime, It triggers the feeling, the feel of need of a someone that could be my world that could change my world. Light, it's a light in a very dark place and it gives me HOPE, I cling to it. I fucking cling into it. For I know what that light brings, for I know what you brings. I grabbed the opportunity to get the light, for a very long time I felt happiness, an unexplainable happiness. I can't exchange that very moment I get the light, when I'm gone now I will have that moment as one of the best things that ever happened to my life. That's something significant. I'm happy the moment I got you, we're like a torch and I'm the one holding you and everything was dark but the moment we move everywhere we go there's light and once a torch now becomes the sun. I see colors, everywhere. I can clearly see the world, once I couldnt see now I can see it clearly. YOU bring the light in this dark world, you let me see things I couldn't see, feel things I coudn't feel and most importantly you let me know that in this world we don't have to be alone, YOU ARE THERE FOR ME. You taught me things I don't know, I'm very thankful, I haven't learn enough from you, I can never get enough from you, I will always be interested in you. YOU can have me in return, the best of me in return, the WHOLE me. I never wanted to lose YOU, I never wanted to lose the, LIGHT. I don't want to go back to the world before you came, I fear of change but you, you help me embrace it and taught me how to accept change. You are the greatest, You are the one I value the most. You fill the holes in me. You color this dull life. And more importantly, You showed me love where I cannot find love at all.

I love you. I just love you so much. so so much. I love you hunn you gave me hope. I love you.

1 comment:

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